I remember
Short Story
We drift down the old back country roads. Fence lines and pastures. House windows spewing light into the darkness. The touch of skin as she passes the blunt. Incubus’s Aqueous Transmission booms through the car’s stereo system.
I reach over for the volume knob and turn it slightly to the left.
“Hey, watch this truck up here.”
I’m not sure why I always agreed to let her drive, especially when we were smoking, which was all the time. She pays me no mind and we are quickly upon the old pickup.
“What the fuck are they doing?” She says, as she steers the car into the left lane and accelerates past the truck.
“Jesus Anna, these are back roads. Not everybody likes flying down ‘em at sixty. Plus, maybe they’re rollin’ one up.”
“Fuck ‘em.”
I roll my eyes, yet a small smile spreads across my lips. Country girl without a care in the world. I glance over at her; the dashboard lights illuminate her face ever so slightly. I’m thinking I should say something – anything to explain the feelings that have sprouted like vines and wrapped themselves around my heart.
“So…”
I’m abruptly interrupted as the car is suddenly teeming with light.
“Oh shit!” Anna shouts.
“You must’ve really pissed ‘em off when you flew by like that,” I say as I turn around.
The old pickup is right behind us with the high beams blaring. I can just about make out the silhouettes of two men sitting in the cab.
“Look, just be easy. Maybe slow down and let ‘em pass.”
“Fuck these motherfuckers!” She says, as she quickly hits the brakes before accelerating once again.
We momentarily pull a distance ahead, but you can only drive so fast on winding back roads and the two men are soon right on our ass again. I look down and realize I’m tightly gripping the handle on the door. The blunt still smolders between the fingers of my left hand. I take three quick hits and then duck the rest of the roach out the window. The sweetness of the grape flavored White Owl lingers on my lips.
“Jesus, just take it easy. Take that right up here and head for the 7-11.” I mutter as I finally let out a hacking cough.
I glance over at her once more; her hands grip the steering wheel tightly. Her face hides her emotions, but the air seems to be saturated with anxiety and fear. I take a deep breath as we meander this way and that. It helps that she knows these roads so well from our many pot fueled rides, but I once again mutter to God and turn around into the vociferous light.
I remember the excited voices of teenage boys and girls. I remember the smell of the brown leather bench seats. I remember the squeal of the door closing as the bus driver pulled that large handle to her right.
I was in middle school, eighth grade to be exact. I was a proud member of the boys basketball team. I had played rec league basketball and soccer, but this was the first time representing my school. It felt like the big time. It was a way for me to feel part of something, but I also found that it boosted my social status, especially with the ladies.
It was the first time I really saw Anna. The cheerleaders sat towards the front of the bus, while the boys basketball team sat towards the back. It must have been on the way to that playoff game we ended up losing. It wasn’t anything much. As I sat down, I looked up and there she was. Eyes locked with mine. She lit up for just a second before turning back to her friends. It was that light.
The light is blinding as it ricochetes off the rear-view mirror.
“They’re just fucking with us Anna, take the right up here and see if they follow.”
“I know Pete! I’m going to the 7-11!”
As the road straightens out for a spell, Anna presses down further on the gas pedal, and I grip the handle on the door that little bit tighter. The light from the truck’s headlights fades as we dangerously turn right towards Route 7. The yellow lines return to the center of the road as we race ever closer to our destination. The truck continues to follow.
I remember my dad’s story.
“Nothing good can come from a middle school relationship.”
I don’t remember saying that. But apparently, I made an impression on my dad. I was a genius in his eyes, wise beyond my years. I imagine I was somewhat afraid of having the type of relationship some of my friends were engaging in. I certainly yearned to give into my sexual urges but dating in middle school scared me. It was such a social and public thing, where everyone knew everything. I was too shy for all that.
Anna had been on my so-called radar ever since that glance on the bus. But when we reached high school she dated one of my best friends. Daniel was the star striker on the soccer team, while I was the goalkeeper. Daniel was a clever player, and not just on the soccer pitch. High school guys will do most anything to get laid. Pussy is the goal for a lot of men even after high school. This has always been a difficult perspective for me to understand. However, I also wonder if women don’t come to expect it and are almost put off when you aren’t eagerly going for their pants.
Daniel had a habit of cheating on his girlfriends and then confessing his sins to me. Anna was no exception to the rule. But of course, Anna came asking one day.
“So, Pete. I gotta ask you something.”
“What’s up Anna?”
“Has Daniel ever cheated on me?”
I tried not to let my face give anything away, but deep down I really did want to tell her the truth.
“Umm. No, he’s never mentioned anyone else.”
“I know he tells you everything!”
“Anna, I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”
“And you’d tell me if I did?”
“Yeah, of course I would.”
I know she deserved better. But Daniel had also trusted me. Daniel was just doing what guys do. The girls loved him, but I think deep down they knew he wasn’t the faithful kind of lover. He was charismatic, flirty, fit, and handsome. The girls couldn’t help themselves just as much as Daniel couldn’t help himself.
It was hard hearing him talk about his sexual adventures, especially the nitty gritty details about Anna. But all I cared about was being a good goalkeeper and winning at all costs. I couldn’t risk our team’s camaraderie and I couldn’t break Daniel’s trust. But when Anna asked me, that light in her eyes dimmed.
This wasn’t our typical blunt ride, but more often than not we ended up at some sort of convenience store in search of munchies. I was sure the 7-11 would be a safe haven and we’d be laughing about this little car chase in just a few minutes as we picked out Doritos, Funyons, and Cheetos.
But my optimism begins to wane as the truck’s headlights once again bathe her car in intense light.
“When we get there, just run inside.”
The 7-11 sign streams light upon the road just ahead and the pickup follows us into the parking lot. Anna pulls into a spot near the door and bolts inside. The truck doesn’t park, but comes to a stop right behind us. I take a deep breath and quickly step out of the car. Standing up straight with my chest out, I turn to face the men.
I remember the waterfall. It was just the other day. I remember the sunlight winking and waving through the leaves of the trees as we walked along that inlet on the Shenandoah. The water grows colder with each advancing step. She asks me to pick her up and carry her. Skin to skin we walk silently as one. The river inlet led to a basin of water just below the small falls. She climbs out of my arms as the water grows deeper and lets out a little moan of shock. The water is frigid. The crash of the waterfall fills our ears as we duck beneath the overhanging rock.
“Hey, old man!” A raspy voice calls out. I still can’t quite make out the faces of the two men sitting in the dim cab of the truck. Old man? Was he talking to me? I turn my head slightly, looking for the old man he spoke of.
I don’t see the barrel of the shotgun slip out of the truck’s window. But then the flash and explosion. My left hand erupts and is gone, blood splatters and pours to the asphalt below as I stumble shakily against the open car door behind me. My mouth agape, my whole body starting to quake, I stare at my wrist momentarily. A loud click brings my focus back to the barrel of the gun. Another flash and explosion and I feel my body sliding against the car door. Drool drips down my face as I lower my head peering down at my caved in chest. My head stays slumped, but I lift my eyes, past the men in the truck, past the light thrown from the 7-11 sign, and into the stars on the horizon.
I remember huddling together under the waterfall. I remember how you brushed that dirty blonde hair away from the bluest eyes. Smiles and little glances. I couldn’t quite hold eye contact with you because that meant I would really have to go through with it. A kiss.
Gripping from start to finish. Sooo well written!! Is it part of the series?
This was good but hard to read the ending. I really didn’t want Peter to get killed. It seemed so senseless. Afterwards I read the beginning again and everything seemed set up for the ending, every piece by trivial seeming piece. Brutal stuff.