Hey MoTy, thanks for checking this one out and for your kind words. This is not part of the series American Football, just a stand alone short story. But thanks again for reading!
This was good but hard to read the ending. I really didn’t want Peter to get killed. It seemed so senseless. Afterwards I read the beginning again and everything seemed set up for the ending, every piece by trivial seeming piece. Brutal stuff.
Hey Deanna, thank you for stopping over and giving me a read. Sorry about the endind, but I still hope you got something out of this one. This story was a difficult one that went through a few different edits. But thanks again for checking this one out!
No, I was invested. Cliffhanger like previously mentioned but with a bullet in his chest your character is definitely dead. Perhaps you are channeling the senselessness of current events and that’s what I was feeling. We don’t really talk about why we make the choices we do when writing a story. Why did this ending click for you?
Well thank you again for reading this one Deanna. And yes, you seemed to read the story for what it is. This story actually goes back 3 years. A version of it featured in my university lit mag. This is a cut and edited version. I also have another story titled “The Bluest Eyes” that is basically a first draft of this one. It's not the same ending.
But I've always felt that guns in general…to use your word…senseless. Although this story did not stem from current events, perhaps I couldn't stop myself from revisiting this one. Thanks again for your thoughts.
Gripping from start to finish. Sooo well written!! Is it part of the series?
Hey MoTy, thanks for checking this one out and for your kind words. This is not part of the series American Football, just a stand alone short story. But thanks again for reading!
Must accept this but the cliffhanger is torturous.
This was good but hard to read the ending. I really didn’t want Peter to get killed. It seemed so senseless. Afterwards I read the beginning again and everything seemed set up for the ending, every piece by trivial seeming piece. Brutal stuff.
Hey Deanna, thank you for stopping over and giving me a read. Sorry about the endind, but I still hope you got something out of this one. This story was a difficult one that went through a few different edits. But thanks again for checking this one out!
No, I was invested. Cliffhanger like previously mentioned but with a bullet in his chest your character is definitely dead. Perhaps you are channeling the senselessness of current events and that’s what I was feeling. We don’t really talk about why we make the choices we do when writing a story. Why did this ending click for you?
Well thank you again for reading this one Deanna. And yes, you seemed to read the story for what it is. This story actually goes back 3 years. A version of it featured in my university lit mag. This is a cut and edited version. I also have another story titled “The Bluest Eyes” that is basically a first draft of this one. It's not the same ending.
But I've always felt that guns in general…to use your word…senseless. Although this story did not stem from current events, perhaps I couldn't stop myself from revisiting this one. Thanks again for your thoughts.