11 Comments
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MoTy's avatar

You don't dress up the words to impress, Peter. Your stories are always distinctively raw - they leave the reader to reflect, but they don't resolve. I respect that.

Peter Smetanick's avatar

Hey MoTy, I truly appreciate your thoughts and kind words, and that's kinda what I'm going for. Just getting you there to think on your own. Thanks again ❤️

MoTy's avatar

I've read several of your pieces now - the voice stays raw, every time. A genuine pleasure, Peter.

Aaliya's avatar

Wow, this story really captures the emotional turmoil and the struggle to let go of a relationship that’s no longer healthy. It’s a powerful reminder of how love can blind us to red flags and how change can be so difficult to accept. I hope you find the strength to move forward and embrace the new chapter in your life. Take care.

Peter Smetanick's avatar

Hey Aaliyah, thanks for checking out some of my work! This story is fiction, but I certainly pull things from my own experiences when creating these stories. But I will still do my best to take care, thanks again for reading ❤️

Deanna Wilk's avatar

Difficult stuff said so naturally and in a memorable voice. You do a really good job of showing this character try to come to terms with who he is, questioning some big ideas about why people stay in bad relationships along the way. I like that he knows he messes up but doesn’t condemn himself.

Peter Smetanick's avatar

Thanks Deanna, this one didn't end the way I thought it would actually.

But, yeah perhaps not blaming ones self completely even when in the wrong helps to push towards growth, which might be a saving grace in the end.

Deanna Wilk's avatar

:) okay, in that case, I’ll add that showing that he lied about taking a shower at the end made the ending satisfyingly ambiguous.

Peter Smetanick's avatar

As long as it was satisfyingly anything for you ❤️

Deanna Wilk's avatar

Yeah, I think so. I think your character mentions conditioning he has surrounding relationships, that bad times are normal and that’s why he sticks around longer. Knowing one’s past/environment plays a big part in what they do takes away some of the self-blame, gives some space to imagine themselves doing differently.

Peter Smetanick's avatar

Thanks again for reading so deeply and giving some thoughtful feedback…it helps me as a writer understand a little more where I'm hitting as a writer. I really appreciate it.